Seriously, she's 5?

I know it's the old cliche, but man, the years do fly.  Actually, I heard it put a better way by my friend Mish, the days are long, but the years are short.  My Elliebelliecicleweedpie is 5.  I don't know why that seems momentous, but it certainly does.

As I have done for her sister and brother, I guess I should take a moment to chronicle her birth here in cyberspace...

Jeff and I had lunch one day in April 2004, and had a couple beers.  We had been "trying" to get pregnant for a month or two and when we got home, with a bit of an afternoon buzz on, Jeff told me to take a pregnancy test.  I went to the powder room, and Jeff played the piano to distract himself... much to my shock, it was positive.  I walked out of the bathroom and said "Jeff?"  He stopped playing, turned around to look at me and I just nodded.  Speechless, he simply hugged and kissed me and we just sort of looked at each other in a "what do we do now" kind of way.  Immediately, we said we would keep it a secret for the prescribed 12 weeks.  After about 30 seconds of complete secrecy, I decided that I would be completely unable to talk to my mother for 8 more weeks and this was not a tenable solution.  So we agreed to call the grandparents that day, and "just tell them".  Their reactions were much as you'd think they'd be - total joy and surprise.  First thing the next morning, my mother called me, telling me that they'd determined that they would be buying a pony, installing a merry go round and hiring a clown within the next 9 months.

Jeff referred to my first pregnancy as the "Great Wife Experiment" and that it was.  He largely stared at me like I was an interesting, if terrifying specimen of never before seen insect, until I finally freaked out about it at week 9 or so.  Mercifully, I never suffered morning sickness, but the first trimester exhaustion was something I could never have imagined.  I would get home from work at 6:30, sleep until 7:30, Jeff would wake me for dinner, I'd eat, drooping in my plate, and then go to bed by 8:30.  Each morning, Jeff would make me lovely yogurt smoothies and send me to work with bags of healthy snacks and strict instructions to drink 400 ounces of water. 

Before I got pregnant, I had some recurring back trouble and was actually scheduled for an MRI that was cancelled because of pregnancy.  During the second and third trimesters, my back grew increasingly painful, but I mostly attributed it to pregnancy weight gain.  By the third trimester, I couldn't really pick my left foot up much past stair height and actually needed assistance to do things like tie my shoes.  My other complaint was heart racing.  I would be sitting perfectly still and suddenly, my heart would begin to beat as though I was running a race, getting into the 120s - 140s.  Luckily, I was working at an office furniture dealership, cause after this happened, I'd have to lay down for twenty minutes, so the couches came in handy.   My doctor, who was very soft spoken, calm doctor, told me this was perfectly normal and if it got worse, he'd put me on bedrest.  This was Dr. Yadav's answer to any question - "Dr. Yadav, my head fell off yesterday.  That's normal, if it gets worse, we'll put you on bedrest."  When this heart racing thing started to happen while I was driving on the Capital Beltway, however, I got nervous.  Nothing like thinking you're going to pass out while driving on that crazy road to make you think twice about driving.   So, Dr. Yadav put me on "house arrest" meaning I couldn't drive anymore.  The day before Thanksgiving 2004 was my last day of work in 5 years...

Now stuck at home, I became fully convinced that I would have this baby early.  Jeff was 6 weeks early, and so was I, so surely our baby would be early.  The holidays sped towards me and I still had a baby on board.  My due date was December 28, and I thought I would certainly have a baby before Christmas.  Christmas eve, we drove to 34th Street in Baltimore and oohed and aahed over the crazy light display and all the while I silently counted contractions.  I hoped that this was the big one... nope.  December 25, 26, 27, 28... nothing.  December 29, 30... nothing.  I developed the "three freakout a day" pattern:  1.  Wake up and cry cause I'm still pregnant  2.  Look at the clock at 3PM and cry cause even if I go into labor today, I won't have a baby until tomorrow  3.  Go to bed crying cause I'm still not in labor. 

The phone became my enemy.  Every call was some well meaning person asking if we'd had the baby, and God forbid you don't answer when you're 41 weeks pregnant.  Jeff sent emails telling people "don't call us, we'll call you."  New Year's Eve, we possibly the morosest dinner of our marriage at Hunan Manor in Columbia.  New Year's Day, we drove to Ocean City, MD, three hours from our hospital, in a bid to dare my uterus to act up.  Finally on January 3, 2005, we went to Dr. Yadav for our 41 week exam and he told us that we were going to have a baby sometime in the next 24 hours. 

You see, I had gone for an ultrasound the Friday before, and the result was that they were estimating the baby would be 10 pounds, 6 ounces and they didn't want it to get any bigger so induction it was for me.  HOLY CRAP!  My mind screamed in denial.  Jeff and I together didn't weigh 10 lbs 6 oz at birth.  After mentally running around like chickens with our heads cut off, Jeff and I got our shit together, called grandparents and our friends and invited them all to have dinner with us one last time.  My induction was to start at 10PM that night.  I'd be on the pitocin drip all night and then in the morning, they'd start cranking it up.

So we had dinner, and then Jeff and I and our fourteen suitcases of crap went to the hospital for our induction.  Let me say, Howard County General Hospital has a NICE birthing facility.  The room looked like a hotel.  It wasn't really until after, when I saw the pictures that I saw any medical equipment at all.  It was all hidden by art work and cabinetry when I arrived.  I had planned to go without an epidural, but once there, I found out that since I was an induction, I would be strapped to the bed and I said, bring on the pain meds.  An IV of Nubain later, I slept all night.  My last full night of sleep since. 

The next day, the nurse started cranking up my pitocin.   I got a lovely epidural and the grandparents all arrived to watch the Erin show.  Our nurse was a nice girl, though she did seem a bit odd.  Before I got the epidural, she told me to go to the bathroom, which I did.  Apparently, the nurse was supposed to record this bit of information, because a little while after the parents arrived, the charge nurse came into our room and confronted our nurse, yelling at her for basic incompetance and saying that she could have caused me to have an emergency C section.   They both left the room, leaving us all a bit unnerved, and then a new nurse came in and introduced herself.  A few minutes after that, the original nurse comes back into the room, crying about being sent home and not being allowed to work on that floor anymore.  So there I am, in labor, hugging a perfect stranger and telling her it'll be alright.  What a looney. 

Shortly after that excitement, it became clear that a baby was coming soon.  Dr. Yadav came in, spoke quietly about how he loved the room we were in because you could watch the Medevac copter land from there and got suited up.  Everyone, except Jeff and Mom cleared out to do the waiting room thing.  When the moment came to push, suddenly, my quiet doctor, the man who had hardly ever spoken above a loud whisper became Mr. Hyde, shouting at me to "PUSH, PUSH, PUSH, HARDER, HARDER, HARDER."  I was so shocked I swear I pushed simply so he would stop yelling at me. 

Pushing was short and sweet only about an hour and out came the baby... I heard "It's a girl!" from the nurse and "She has dimples" from my mom.  My first words were, "Jeff, give me your wallet" cause I knew the combo of a girl and dimples would be his undoing.  Elizabeth Helen Lacey was a petite 8 lbs 9 oz, a little off from the late ultrasound estimate.

Ellie gets her name from two of her great grandmothers.  You see, Jeff and I both lost our grandmothers within a couple weeks of each other.  We still weren't in contact at the time, but the way we have it figured, Elizabeth Hoover and Helen Lacey must have met up in heaven and realized that their grandkids knew each other.  We attribute our reuniting to them, so when we found out we were pregnant, we knew within moments that if it was a girl, she would be named for these two women we loved so dearly and missed so much.  I hope that someday, we'll be able to explain to Ellie how the grace of those two ladies touched our lives and left a mark so great that we honored her with their names. 

On a couple of side notes, the wacky nurse actually came to visit me in the maternity ward.  I was nice to her, cause I was afraid she'd try to steal my baby or something.  When I found out that I was preggers with Maggie, I went to a new practice in Columbia - one with midwives that hopefully wouldn't yell at me - and the midwife asked me why I wanted to try birth with a midwife and I explained that I was a little shaken by the idea that one person had such control over me and she said "Oh, that was YOU?"  It seems the story of that nurse had made some news among the medical community in Columbia.  Also, the back pain I had talked about... well, it got way worse after birth, but I was still trying to make it be about pregnancy weight.  I was unable to walk any distance at all, and I mean the distance from the couch to the TV was pushing it.  I went to the doctor about my wrist, which I had hurt during labor.  She noticed that I was walking strangely, and after a short exam, sent me for an MRI.  That was Tuesday.  By Wednesday, I had seen a neurologist, and had a discectomy scheduled for Friday.  The neurologist said that he'd never seen anyone with a herniation as large as mine that was able to walk, let alone control their bodily functions.  The following week, I was right as rain... and I've never had back problems again.  It was amazing. 

All in all, Ellie has brought great joy to so many people - I never get tired of watching her charm people with her intelligence and her inquisitiveness.  She is a totally unique person and she is my total joy.  I try not to play favorites with my kids, but my Ellie is truly my girl in every way.  I love her and I can't wait to see the girl/young lady/woman she grows into. 

Thanks for indulging me in yet another LONG post... those of you that know me well, know that there are no short stories from me!